WTF? Monopoly The Movie.

Alright, just to kick off this little 'blog' as it is so called, a WTF moment. The title is true folks, try not to be alarmed too much. A Monopoly movie is being 'strongly' considered. I know they say don't take the Lord's name in vein but... JESUS H CHRIST ON A WALRUS, WHAT THE FUDGE?

Well, to start with, nothing has been confirmed as of yet, but the man in question, one Frank Beddor, producer and "writer" of such films as 'There's Something About Mary', has published his idea (all-be-it an awful one) in the L.A Times. Now, please tell me if this makes any sense, here's the direct quote:

"I created a comedic, lovable loser who lives in Manhattan and works at a real estate company and he’s not very good at his job but he’s great at playing Monopoly. And the world record for playing is 70 straight days – over 1,600 hours – and he wanted to try to convince his friends to help him break that world record. They think he is crazy. They kid him about this girl and they're playing the game and there’s this big fight. And he’s holding aChance card and after they’ve left he says, ‘Damn, I wanted to use that Chance card,’ and he throws it down. He falls asleep and then he wakes up in the morning and he’s holding the Chance card, and he thinks, ‘That’s odd.'"

But wait, there's more:

"He’s all groggy and he goes down to buy some coffee and he reaches into his pocket and all he has is Monopoly money. All this Monopoly money pours out. He’s confused and embarrassed and the girl reaches across the counter and says, ‘That’s OK.’ And she gives him change in Monopoly money. He walks outside and he’s in this very vibrant place, Monopoly City, and he’s just come out of a Chance Shop. As it goes on, he takes on the evilParker Brothers in the game of Monolopy. He has to defeat them. It tries to incorporate all the iconic imageries -- a sports car pulls up, there's someone on a horse, someone pushing a wheelbarrow -- and rich Uncle Pennybags, you're going to see him as the maître d' at the restaurant and he's the buggy driver and the local eccentric and the doorman at the opera. There's all these sight gags."

The most disturbing part of this tale is yet to come. Attached to direct is 3 times Oscar Nominee and all round great bloke.... wait for it... guessed yet? RIDLEY MOFOING SCOTT! Why the hell would someone of his talent agree to direct such a monstrosity? Well, here's my theory on why;

It seems that on Mr Beddor's IMDB profile, there is a film 'in production' called 'The Looking Glass Wars'. This is blatently a reference/remake of Alice in Wonderland. But Tim Burton got their first with his hilarity and cooky imagery, so Beddor thought 'Fuck it, I'm screwed now.' and so, worked up a new idea around the popular board game. So where does Ridley come into this twisted game? Well, he signed on when it was still an Alice in Wonderland idea and for some reason is still on the bill. I HOPE he changes his mind quickly after he sees the L.A. Times, but like all Die Hard Scott fans, I'm worried he won't.

To all those still reading, I have fourthcoming news... it seems the so far 'Untitled' new Alien project has begun production. Good ol' Ridley is finishing off production on the 2010 bound 'Robin Hood' with Russell Crowe and Cate Blanchette first, but then is moving straight on. So what do I say? BRING ON THE PREQUEL!

Anyway, thanks for reading this rather bone shatteringly boring blog, I promise it'll be more interesting later.

B.